What Happened to Elegance, Manners, and Class?

“There was a time when men were kind, when their voices were soft, and their words inviting.” – Victor Hugo, Les Miserables

A Look at How Society Has Changed

Have you ever watched old movies from the 1950s, 60s, or 70s and felt like you were looking at an entirely different species of humans? The way people dressed, spoke, and carried themselves—it all seemed so refined, so dignified, so… different from today.

Men were gentlemen. Women were ladies. Even the way they walked, stood, and made eye contact carried a sense of self-respect and honor. There was a natural elegance, a deep-rooted sense of manners, etiquette, and decorum—not just in the wealthy elite but even among working-class individuals. Even the servants in those films had impeccable manners and grace.

Fast-forward to today, and it’s hard not to notice the stark contrast. People rush through life stressed, impatient, aggressive, and rude. Manners have become an afterthought. Conversations are casual to the point of carelessness. Even the way people dress often seems like a rejection of elegance. What happened? How did we go from class and refinement to chaos and carelessness?

Let’s break it down.

1. The Decline of Manners and Social Etiquette

Now? Basic manners are rare.

  • People push past each other without a second thought.
  • Conversations are filled with interruptions, shouting, and a lack of patience.
  • There’s an overwhelming “me first” attitude instead of a sense of community and respect.

Why? One theory is that as society became more individualistic and fast-paced, the focus shifted from how we treat others to how quickly we can get ahead.

2. The Loss of Elegance and Style

“The first step to being respected is to look respectable.” – Will Rogers

Look at photos from past decades, and you’ll see something striking: people looked effortlessly elegant, even in simple clothing.

  • Men wore tailored suits, polished shoes, and had strong posture.
  • Women dressed with grace, even in casual settings.
  • Even children were well-dressed and presentable.

Now?

  • People dress in sweatpants, ripped jeans, or oversized T-shirts everywhere—even in formal settings.
  • Polish and neatness have been replaced with a love for the “effortless, lazy look.”
  • Fashion now prioritizes rebellion over refinement.

This shift isn’t just about clothing—it’s about how people carry themselves. Elegance isn’t just in fabric; it’s in demeanor, movement, and attitude.

3. The Breakdown of Gender Roles and Politeness Between Men and Women

There was once a time when:

  • Men were chivalrous. They opened doors, pulled out chairs, and protected women—not because they were weak but because they were valued.
  • Women embraced femininity. They carried themselves with grace, mystery, and confidence—without feeling the need to act aggressive or dominant.

Today?

  • Chivalry is often seen as offensive or outdated.
  • Feminine grace is sometimes mistaken for weakness.
  • There’s a growing tension between men and women—as if we’ve forgotten how to appreciate and complement each other.

Some argue this change is about equality, but did we throw away respect in the process?

4. The Rise of Selfishness and Materialism

Decades ago, people valued relationships, honor, and community.

  • They took time to sit down for meals as families.
  • They built friendships based on loyalty, not convenience.
  • People valued character over material wealth.

Now?

  • People are glued to their phones instead of engaging with real humans.
  • Success is measured by material possessions—the newest phone, luxury brands, social media followers.
  • People are more disconnected than ever, despite being “connected” online.

Could it be that the more technology connects us, the more it isolates us from real, meaningful human interactions?

5. A Culture That Glorifies Rebellion Over Refinement

“Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners.” – Laurence Sterne

Older generations were raised to believe that discipline, honor, and dignity were signs of strength.

Today, society seems to celebrate the opposite.

  • Being loud, rebellious, and controversial is often more respected than being graceful, composed, and wise.
  • We praise those who “speak their mind”—even if it’s rude or disrespectful.
  • There’s a loss of self-control—from social media rants to public outbursts.

People confuse “being real” with being rude, and in doing so, we’ve lost the ability to handle situations with class and grace.

6. A Generation Raised Without the Same Values

A major factor behind this shift is how we are raised.

  • Many people today were not taught manners, discipline, or the importance of etiquette.
  • Parents used to correct children, teaching them respect from a young age.
  • Now, many parents are afraid to discipline or correct bad behavior.

As a result, we have generations growing up without learning basic human decency and social grace.

Can We Bring Back Elegance, Manners, and Dignity?

The world has changed, but does that mean we have to accept the decline of elegance and respect? Maybe it’s time for a comeback—a movement toward grace, honor, and kindness.

How Can We Restore a Sense of Elegance and Manners?

  • Practice basic politeness—Say please, thank you, excuse me.
  • Dress with care—You don’t need to be rich to be well-presented.
  • Respect people’s time and space—A little courtesy goes a long way.
  • Value human connections over technology—Put the phone down and have real conversations.
  • Embrace self-discipline—Strength is not in loudness, but in self-control.
  • Encourage honor and respect in relationships—Men and women should treat each other with dignity.
  • Teach the next generation—If we don’t pass down these values, they will disappear entirely.

“The way we live, the way we treat each other, and the way we view the world is a reflection of our internal state.”

Final Thought

Society has changed—but we don’t have to accept the decline of grace, manners, and dignity as inevitable. We can choose to bring back the best parts of the past: the elegance, the refinement, the respect for others, and the honor in how we carry ourselves.

Maybe, just maybe, we can inspire a return to class, dignity, and true human connection.

Do you feel the same way about how society has changed? Do you think there’s hope for a return to elegance? Let me know in the comments!

Join & Save 10%!

Plus exclusive updates, special offers, and inspiration straight to your inbox!

Related Posts

Shopping Cart